love

#LoveSeries #Feb1st-14th #2017

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For the first 14 days of February, I received instructions from God to talk about Love…not just the mushy, everything is perfect, no issues, unrealistic kind of love because we all know love will be tested. No, this is about  Love and all of its varies components. The bible is filled with scripture that is so applicable to Love and love situations and I was excited to be able to use 13 scriptures that served as inspiration for these short, about 1 minute poems (on Youtube). I didn’t want the month to be over without sharing with my Blog followers this series so below I have shared these poems. On day 14, I ended the series with a video poem called,”Highway of Love”…..to catch the videos for each poem, please visit my youtube link: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRrn3TMAo8iz5AMjaKnQ9CQ

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Proverbs 13:12 “Hope deferred makes the heart sick.”

I know what it means to wait…I mean, I had to wait 14 years to get a drivers permit, I had to wait 4 years for a high school diploma and college degree…and I can remember being a young girl playing with Barbie’s and fantasizing about having my very own Ken. Being told time and time again to concentrate on living your life, getting an education and good job then focus on being a wife. So I did those things and I waited. Even in a relationship that I thought would end in marriage, I waited….even when I knew it was not going to end that way, I still waited. A delay is not denial and a anxious heart does not mean it’s hopeless. Sick at times, tired at times, but still beating…

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay1 #Poetry

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Proverbs 24:26 “An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips.” 

I know he didn’t want to admit the pain of the past. The aroma of residue could not be eliminated through lies. Dishonesty has a way of prolonging destiny. God loves to use broken vessels. And just because it’s Jesus specialty to put broken lives back together, it doesn’t make it easy. Fear gripped him like a bully on the playground and pride threw the sucker punches to the throat. But it didn’t silence his voice. He said, he didn’t want to lose me so he persevered through the pain of pride. His honesty was like poetry to me.

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay2 #Poetry

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Proverbs 24:32 “I applied my heart to what I observed and learned a lesson from what I saw.”  

I watched my man praise God. It revealed a spiritual conversation that he didn’t share with me. He went before the throne boldly. At first, I could not help but stare because it was like the God in Him begin to minister to the sin in me that I tried to conceal. Unspoken conviction raised a praise like vomit and my mouth begin to overflow with repentance. His admiration and reverence for the King affected me. I felt my love deepen witnessing his communion with the Most High God as a powerful lead in my life and our family. The power of praise made words no longer necessary.

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay3 #Poetry

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Song of Songs 7:1 “How beautiful your sandaled feet, O prince’s daughter! Your graceful legs are like jewels, the work of an artist’s hands.

Women with quick, long strides are trying to get to their destination. Movement builds over time and in no time she arrived looking like a bag lady. She was carrying her dignity because she had to take a job that wasn’t paying enough. She was carrying her responsibilities because she had mouths to feed. She was carrying her insecurities worried about how she looked when the load felt unbearable. She was carrying love knowing that her effort was helping out her King who God ordained as her helpmate because his hours at work were reduced indefinitely. She carried weight like a stallion beautifully.

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay4 #Poetry

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Song of Songs 1:12 “ While the King was at his table, my perfume spread its fragrance.” 

I didn’t even part my lips to speak because the conversation going on in my head was louder than the conversations taking place in the room. Like a California stop, I slowed down long enough to find my seat, my feet suddenly began to pick up speed because the 7 inch heels were unapologetic. I was wearing a new perfume scent. It took me a long time to invest in myself so I decided to wear it tonight. He rose from his seat as if he was hypnotized headed straight towards me. His look spoke a foreign language. I didn’t understand so I adjusted my hair and rubbed my lips together making sure my lipstick was smooth and even. He arrived. Paused. Smiled. And said, ”Excuse me Miss, what’s that you’re wearing?” I replied, ”Confidence.”

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay5 #Poetry

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Song of Songs 8:6 “ Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame.

Our friendship is many calendar years old. We stop counting after love was realized but not initiated. Separate life paths were made up of unplanned meeting spots where our check-ins never concluded with us checking out. Open ended until we met again. It wasn’t life but death of a matriarch and patriarch in our individual families that created a closeness of hearts trying to mend individually and together. Laughter with you is not the same with anyone else….you have a way of bringing out that wild, belly flopping, mouth wide open not trying to be cute kind of laugh.

Everytime.

And it picks back up every time we meet.

This internal flame never went out but it was getting weak.

And this time, our meeting concluded with you deciding to never meet unplanned again. So you took my hand and initiated love with a check out day, time and place. The risk was becoming too great to keep meeting with no plan or experiencing a ‘no show’ due to another man.

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay6 #Poetry

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Proverbs 10:12 “ Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses.”

I stopped paying attention. My world reduced to an island with one occupant.

Me.

You noticed.

And after numerous attempts and arguments to gain my attention,

your silence became loud and your presence empty…your smile no longer filled the room because you made room for someone who slowed down long enough to notice your smile. She knew your arrival to the office.

Her Good Morning greeting was well-timed and her conversation effortless.

The power of words through communication moved his mind and then his hands.

You and her. Alone.

Then Infidelity. Then a Baby.

It spiritually killed me.

But what it taught me, progressed in me, revealed in me, convicted in me, corrected in me and showed me was my love was stronger, long-suffering, wiser, deeper and tested beyond the vows of my wedding day. Love Prevails

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay7 #Poetry

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1 Corinthians 15: 33

Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”

He praised the reprobate mindset and fed my flesh whatever it yearned for making it harder to resist. Being connected to him was encouraging the battle to partake in sin. Countless mornings started with praise but by nightfall my mind was in a daze from all the hell he raised, what’s happening? Struggling between what’s wrong and what’s right but when I thought about life before him, I had discipline, purpose and contentment. I’ve turned into someone else because of someone else I gave my time, my mind and my soul to. His corruption created detours and distractions in the plan and purpose for my life. My money, I recovered over time but my character paid the price.

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay8 #Poetry

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Proverbs 25:28 “ Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control.”

She was a walking corpse. Dead to Life because her reckless decisions made her numb to the pain of losing control. Control over her mind and body rejected by love. She bled her insecurities openly to strangers online and at a drop of any dime from any man who pursued her. She ignored the ill will intentions of boundaries that were trespassed by well design counterfeits. Pain convinced her that standing for nothing was easier because it didn’t require a fight. Emotions are not reality. God was not present in her life. She was sinking like a ship with no sail and thought she could do it all without HIM. #EpicFail

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay9 #Poetry

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Proverbs 26:11 “As a dog returns to its vomit, so fools repeat their folly.

He had no game…just good conversation and He paid attention.. She was a friend of a friend that caught his eye so after she accepted his Facebook request, he went on a scavenger hunt. Pictures, post, albums, repeat….his research painted a ‘picture’ of her. Cyber stalking check –ins, he decided to pull up and make his appearance seem ‘random’. He knew enough to seduce her mind long without ever touching her. But it wasn’t long before she let him touch her. Then he beat her. The confusion of a love-beat combo perpetuated until it was no longer hidden as she lived in pain and entertained death like a live in guest.

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay10 #Poetry

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Song of Songs 2:7

Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you
by the gazelles and by the does of the field:
Do not arouse or awaken love
until it so desires

I often played too close to the line of “wait” and “regret.” Relying on physical strength to pull me back trying to stay ahead of my mind and not letting my mind lead my body, almost always led to regret. Igniting the fire of temptation with reckless wordplay I created the perfect ingredients for moments of sinful pleasure to become quick memories. This behavior stayed on repeat until my actions caused a reaction and life paused. Everything I desired for my myself became spiritually dormant due to preventable agony and no one to blame but me. I opened doors that were closed, windows that were shut and jumped gates because my desire was greater than my discipline. Time and time again God intervened and then he saved me locking that desire up for the one he has created for me.

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay11 #Poetry

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Psalm 46: 5

God is within her, she will not fall;
God will help her at break of day.

I know it wasn’t right but I gave him my life before he made me his wife. I blame love and those butterflies things that seem to consume me every time I would hear his voice…or look into his eyes longer than 5 seconds, I promise you, I think he put a spell on me…or maybe slipped something in my coffee…I allowed him full access with no clearance so it became easy for him to hurt me. I can’t even begin to count the nights where I woke up to tear soaked pillows and puffy eyes, but I woke up. God kept getting me up each day to prove that He had more power than the woes of a broken heart and more purpose than a relationship that I praised more than Him.

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay12 #Poetry

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James 1:19

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.

I hate when we argue but lately it’s becoming personal. I thought we vowed to protect each other’s wounds but we behave like a covenant doesn’t exist. I would listen long enough to respond because to hear the truth about me hurt. It ignited every fear, disappointment and insecurity that I tried to hide and deny. My life was a lie I forced you to believe until you smelled the residue of death on my breathe from dead fruit you tried to reseed over and over again..you never understood why every attempt to speak life got lost in translation….I learned the art to drown sound with fast talking because it didn’t require processing…just a reckless reaction that choked and killed my marriage.

FB: Chiccy Baritone ~ Poet #LoveSeriesDay13 #Poetry

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For Day 14, see video by clicking Youtube Link above

 

 

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“It Takes Someone Strong To Make Someone Strong”

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“It Takes Someone Strong To Make Someone Strong.”
That Is my Momma, Viola Corrine Evans….

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Yes, the holidays are hard and the anniversary of her earthly death and funeral will always be a reflective time for me. The power of WHO my mom was rocks me to the core when I think about what she endured not only with her health but also her personal life.
The insight of STRENGTH became real after my mom died. Sure, I saw her display strength throughout my life that will always be in my memory like the time I got into a really bad car accident on my way to minister poetry at a candlelight vigil in Columbia, SC at Bibleway Church of Atlas Road, coming from Greenville, SC. It was a rainy morning and as I continued to speed in the rain, I knew that I needed to slow down because like my mom would always say, once you are late; speeding is not going to change that!
Well…I almost died that day…
I hydroplane, and thankful to God, ended up on the side of the road about 100 feet from a bridge! I can remember blacking out and becoming conscious again when a young man’s hands cupped around my face said to me, “Open your eyes young lady..you are alive and you are going to be okay!” The only thing I can remember about that man is that he had a “Gap between his teeth like me” ***smile***
He grabbed my phone and called my mom…by the time they arrived there was a small group of people who had gathered around me in support of making sure I was okay. The next moment was a moment I will never forget…I saw the crowd ‘part like the red sea’ and it was my MOMMA. She didn’t say a word but she made her way to me, grabbed me into her arms and held me. We just cried because I think in that moment we realized how close I was to death. I will never forget the look in her eyes. It was such a powerful, intense look of strength and LOVE.
One more example I have to share was the day of my housewarming. It was the same day my mom had dialysis. On those days, I can count on her being completely wiped out afterwards for about 4 hours so I normally would not bother her. You can only imagine how shocked I was when she told me,”I’m coming to your housewarming.” My mom went through her treatment and her, my father and niece drove 1 hour and 45mins to see my brand new house in Greer, SC. When my mom walked through the door, she was quiet as she looked around on the first level of my house as if she was one of the inspectors making sure everything was OKAY because her baby girl was going to be living there. I would catch her smiling and looking back at me as I walked behind her. She was so proud of me and my heart was full…so full because she taught me STRENGTH in that moment. You see, I was in amazement of her strength because nothing, not even being sick, was going to stop her. She never complained around me and still made people laugh because that was who she was. A pleasure to be around….and a soldier who fought for her life, her family and her marriage.

I can take a lifetime going through countless examples of my mom displaying that kind of strength throughout my life but I gave those two examples just to get to this point of the insight of her strength AFTER she died…
Many issues in my mom’s life concerning her marriage really begin to come out after she died.
And these are not issues that span over a few years but well over 20 years that I had absolutely NO CLUE about…you know why? Here is my conclusion and the truth of the matter…
My mom ‘shielded’ us (her kids—Quanita, Me and DeWayne) from ‘blows’ to her personal life and marriage all because she wanted us to not worry about her and to create a positive childhood for us.
As a child, I can remember certain things but she ALWAYS went out of her way to try and protect us…
In her absence, I feel her presence and I honor her STRENGTH…
My mom was no pushover….no, let’s be REAL clear about that…but she loved her family and made sure we had everything we needed not necessarily everything we wanted.
She taught me what it means to be a lady at all times…even when you are upset and disappointed.
She carried herself in a classy way never forgetting her country roots from Hopkins, SC where her brothers and sisters still reside.
I would pick on her all the time for not wanting to explore the world but the truth is, she did…through others, including myself, because every time I traveled, she wanted to hear about the details of my trip giving me her undivided attention. She loved hearing how much traveling made me happy….
…..the night before she died, I was the last person she talked to and it was such an encouraging and inspiring conversation as my mom learned about a recent ‘break-up’ I had with my boyfriend at the time. She was speaking LIFE into me as she said, “stay strong—keep on going baby because you are doing so well with your life. You are going to need a man that can be supportive and love you.” That was only some of a very lengthy conversation. **smile**
She made me STRONG because she was….
I had 33 years with her and I thank God for my Commander in Chief—a real Soldier at Heart—Loved God and Loved her Family….and for that, I’m grateful because I have turned out to be a woman of STRENGTH and courage…..Thank you Momma
Xoxo Chiccy Baritone

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Wake up…

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Wake Up…

But first let me explain what I mean when I say “Wake up”. There are many people who are ‘unresponsive’ to how they are feeling…really feeling, about the latest events in the world, more so in South Carolina, that has received national attention. This attention has also cause a lot of tension in our Country and a lot of people talking…and some, not talking, that I feel should speak up and speak out but they have chosen not to..why?

I don’t think that all public opinion is effective but there are some voices that are choosing to not respond to the latest tragedies in the United States..What I don’t want to sound like is a ‘broken record’ reiterating every incident and any details surrounding those incidents but for those who have said,”I’m just going to go back in my hole (figuratively) and wait until it all blows over or becomes a thing of yesterday,” I want to challenge you to speak UP because what’s on your mind may be that very perspective that someone struggling with the reality of every hate crime, massacre or racist issue need to hear. While I struggled initially with the back to back events (Charleston, SC Mother Emmanuel AME church massacre to 9 black people in the middle of bible study, The debate and protest over the Confederate Flag in Columbia, SC coming down and the U.S Supreme Court ruling legalizing same-sex marriage) I took a ‘pause’ to pray and seek spiritual guidance from my Savior Jesus Christ because my ‘natural’ response will be the wrong response. Then I begin to have these conversations with my friends and family. My desire is that I represent God every time I open my mouth…Yes, it’s the ultimate challenge, but the power of the ‘pause’ helps me to direct my thoughts FIRST to what I should say that would represent my God and my faith. As a poet, I take it very seriously what words I choose to use because my desire first is to speak TRUTH and in LOVE…then to edify the spirit of the listener…and if creatively you are entertained, well that’s a bonus *smile*…but what I am troubled by is the ‘careful’ response to not  ‘offend’ because clearly, as long as you are living, there will be a time in your life where offense will come, but what’s important is stating your difference, in LOVE, and thinking about what is the standard of your LOVE.

Think about that statement for a minute. What does LOVE represent to you and how you view people? While hate and evil is an inevitable part of this world, and many people are responding because of their own fear to their ignorance, what would you want to say or do that will be the difference in the outcome of every situation I listed above? For me, I will write about it, talk about it and move in whatever direction God would have for me to move in order to bring awareness which is different for everyone. But being “unresponsive” is not acceptable…you know why?

Because there may be young people either in your home, your family or in your community that need to understand the history behind what is going on. They need to hear other perspectives outside of Social Media (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, etc. etc.) and TV. They need the voice of experience, maturity and honesty to penetrate what is or is not being said. And as much as we may not want to admit to it, one thing I know for sure when it comes to change…..

Communication will always be our life line to change!

“The tongue has the power of life and death,
and those who love it will eat its fruit.” Proverbs 18:21

You have the power to change the mindset of anyone who is talking ‘destructively” or living a ‘destructive’ life simply by what you speak and the power of what you speak. It can go either way—but saying nothing…at all…should not be an option. So, here’s my alarm clock (blog) reminder to you to “Wake Up”

~Chiccy Baritone

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In dedication to Valentine’s Day 2015—One of a kind LOVE

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ONE of a kind

By Charlene Evans

Many have heard of the 4 different types of love based on the ancient Greek language and some have not. Well, If you have not, allow me to introduce you to the four kinds of love and a brief description (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greek_words_for_love)

  • Agápe means “love” (unconditional love) in modern day Greek, such as in the term s’agapo, which means “I love you”. In Ancient Greek, it often refers to a general affection or deeper sense of “true love” rather than the attraction suggested by “eros“. Agape is used in the biblical passage known as the “love chapter”, 1 Corinthians 13, and is described there and throughout the New Testament as sacrificial love. Agape was appropriated by Christians for use to express the unconditional love of God. Before agape love there was no other word to express such great love.
  • Éros is passionate love, with sensual desire and longing. The Modern Greek word “erotas” means “intimate love;” however, eros does not have to be sexual in nature. Eros can be interpreted as a love for someone whom you love more than the philia, love of friendship. It can also apply to dating relationships as well as marriage.
  • Philia means friendship or affectionate love in modern Greek. In ancient texts, philos denoted a general type of love, used for love between family, between friends, a desire or enjoyment of an activity, as well as between lovers.
  • Storge means “affection” in ancient and modern Greek. It is natural affection, like that felt by parents for offspring. Rarely used in ancient works, and then almost exclusively as a descriptor of relationships within the family. It is also known to express mere acceptance or putting up with situations, as in “loving” the tyrant.

We all, after reading the four types, can probably more than likely fit people in our lives in one of the categories or multiple. But the one category that I would like to focus on is Agape. In my opinion, it’s listed first because it is supreme! It requires you to look beyond the conditions that are hindering you to give love in the manner where it has no boundaries.  I have heard pastor’s preach about Agape love and reference this type of love that Jesus has for all of us but practicing this type of love is not impossible but challenging. Disappointments and offenses, unmet expectations and betrayal are only a few of the types of conditions that can cause you to fall out of love with someone. But what about the command that Jesus has placed on us,

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. (John 13:34) It doesn’t get any simpler than that, huh? I didn’t think so, but what I thought about is if we love HIM (Jesus) and He is asking us to do something, no matter how hard it may be, shouldn’t we just do it? Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind. For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil. (Ecclesiastes 12:13-14).

So, what God commands is not a debate but a requirement and when the love of the father is spiritually in us, we will do it because we LOVE Him. There is none like HIM on the earth…never have and never will be. And if we never had “Agape” love mirrored in front of us in our childhood or never taught what it meant to love anyone on that level, I have good news! You have an example in our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ! He Loves US so much that he died for our sins and HIS desire is that no man should perish but have everlasting life! So, if we represent Jesus Christ and our God is LOVE (1John 4:8) we will strive to love like HIM and represent exactly what we are as an example of the love HE has shown…. “One of a KIND”.

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